There's Nothing Wrong With Ohio?

In the build up to receiving this vicar call, it was somewhat inevitable that thoughts would cross my mind about where I might be going.  I tried to fight those thoughts off as much as I could since I really had no control over it, so to dwell on or worry about it wouldn't do too much good.  There was one thing that I let myself hope for: fun sports teams to cheer for.

So, I got called to South Dakota.  The nearest major sports market is at least a 4 hour drive away, but that's alright.  Who needs the Vikings or the Twins when you've got the Jackrabbits?  This got me to thinking today: what would be the worst possible place to get called as far as sports go?  Let me throw in the disclaimer here that it would be a privilege to be involved in gospel ministry anywhere, whether or not there are good sports teams there.  This post really could probably simply be titled, "The worst sports city in America." But, since I plan to adopt the local teams as my secondary home teams once I get a permanent call, it'll be entertaining to look at the possible landing spots and consider which cities would be harder to enjoy sports in.

In order for an even comparison, we've really gotta limit this to markets that support franchises of each of the big 3.  That limits us to 16 markets, which are: Boston, New York, Philadelphia, Arizona, Chicago, Cleveland, Detroit, Wisconsin, Dallas, Houston, Atlanta, Miami, Washington, Minnesota, Denver and San Francisco.

Here are my top 3 least desirable:

1. Cleveland.  If we're talking superlatives in any major sport, I'm not sure there'd be a "least desirable" franchise that's not located in Cleveland.  I don't even think this requires discussion.
2. New York.  There are six major sports franchises in New York, and the only one I have positive feelings about is the Knicks.  The Yankees and the Jets need no explanation.  The Giants are just irritating.  The Mets inexplicably manage to be irrelevant despite the fact that they're located on the biggest stage in the world.  And do we really need to talk about the team formerly known as the New Jersey Nets?  Even the Knicks have been most noteworthy in recent years for squandering playoff chances with talented teams.  New York is a Patrick Ewing away from overtaking the #1 spot.
3. Miami.  It surprises me a little bit that the home of the reigning NBA champs could make it this high.  That just speaks to how undesirable the other teams are.  The re-branded Marlins still can't get anyone to come to their games.  The two biggest questions for the Dolphins this year are, "how will we replace Dan Marino?" and "is it worth keeping Ryan Tannehill around just for his lady?"  Miami is in rough shape, but having the best player in professional sports will keep you out of the top two.

There they are.  I'd be happy to hear your thoughts as to which city should've made the list and why my picks are entirely wrong.